Colette said that… whoever she is.
Here’s the thing. Yesterday morning at work, I checked my wallet… because I needed some little things like bread and milk and I wanted to see how much I had. What I had had in my wallet the previous afternoon was literally all I had left… I have also told Damien a few times in the last few months that we won’t be anywhere near the lap of luxury for a loooong time! We won’t lose our flat or our car and we won’t go hungry, but take out and coca cola is history for a while.
So yesterday morning, I find just ten bucks in my wallet.
So I kept quiet- at work- but I knew Damien had taken the rest.
Thank goodness for my happy pills bunnies…
Any of my fairly regular- or long term- readers may remember that this is not the first time I’ve had trouble with Damien having “sticky fingers”, and we deal with it, you know? But it doesn’t ever get easy and it ALWAYS disappoints me.
So when I fetched Damien yesterday, we drove away from the house he goes to after school and I asked him if he had something to tell me.
He was quiet for a while and said “Yes”.
Then I replied that he knew that I knew and that if he lied to me his punishment would be worse than he thought…
He answered that he’d taken sixty bucks out of my wallet that morning to buy raw materials to make scenery for the Warhammer club at school.
I just said ok.
When we got home, I handed him a shopping bag and told him to make a selection from his CD, DVD and PS2 and to pack his little CD player boom box thingy in the bag and I said that if he refused to choose any CDs or DVDs I’d do it for him. I also took his wallet with his bank card in it. He didn’t argue. He packed some stuff and we then made a quick trip to the Cash Converters in the nearby shopping centre and pawned it all. At the pawn shop I told him he had the option of buying his stuff back at the end of the month if he wanted to. He said no. So I got my money back, and then some, and then we went and did some grocery shopping.
It was not and will not be mentioned again because he has now been punished.
This was not the first time either- several years ago he took fifty bucks out of my wallet and I pawned his new scooter (those silver fold up two wheel thingies that were all the rage at one time) to get my money back. He wasn’t happy- but he didn’t do it again for a while…
A lot of ADHDers learn best from “natural” consequences- like cause and effect. Giving them a hiding or grounding them doesn’t work too well because they’ve forgotten the incident less than an hour later… at least, Damien does…
So what would you have done?
There Is Never An Excuse
One in three is not a statistic - one in three is a crying shame.