I am trying to brace myself for a major parenting slash growing up step this weekend.
I have never left Damien alone overnight. I know it sounds strange, him being 17 and all… but my being single forever was a factor, as well as his ADHD and his intense love of all things combustible. I am hopelessly paranoid- and I think justifiably so- when it comes to Damien looking after himself.
I know it will happen eventually… but right now I can’t even leave him home alone for a few hours without checking on him at least once. And if he doesn’t answer the phone when I do try to make sure he’s okay, I am practically on my way to the car, picturing fire engines and emergency vehicles taking up what little pavement there is outside my flat and trying to get to Damien before the whole block is razed to the ground.
I am so positive I frighten myself…
But, as Glugs keeps telling me, I am going to have to let him grow up some time.
And to that end, Damien is house-sitting with J this weekend… the two of them, alone at J’s house, all weekend. House-sitting… This just screams “let’s-have-a-party-and-drink-all-the-booze-in-the-house-whilst-smoking-up-a-ganja-storm-and-nailing-as-many-babes-as-we-can”, but I am trying my damnedest not to think too much about it.
I am telling myself that Damien and J will be well behaved all weekend and J’s mom will be able to come home to a tidy and intact house on Monday. That Damien can be responsible for himself.
I am telling myself this, I promise!
I mailed my Glugs this morning telling him more about Damien house-sitting… if there’s anyone on this planet who gets just how neurotic I am about Damien (in case any of you think I am exaggerating) its the Glugster, and this was his reply:
“I know it makes you nervous and you will probably be stressing about it the whole weekend, but I think it is a good dry run to get it started. This will give him the opportunity to show you that you can trust him to be on his own. He’s getting old now. I think you should at least give him the chance. I know how difficult this is for you my love, and I will try to make it as easy as possible for you.”
How lucky am I to have landed myself such a divinely understanding man!!?!
So wish me luck bunnies… I am going to be working very hard to keep myself from hiding in the bushes across the street from J’s house so I can spy on them all weekend. Perhaps a drive-by every thirty minutes or so will go unnoticed? Then I can make sure my darling Damien is okay and not being led astray by some little strumpet in a short skirt sporting a belly-ring.