Thats How I thought It Worked…

The way I was raised, and taught about relationships, is that when you decide someone is the love of your life and your soul mate, and the person you are in love with feels the same way their baggage becomes your baggage, to a certain degree. Especially if you get married.

And quite frankly, I believe this goes double if you profess yourself a Christian.

I’m not saying you should allow yourself to be a door mat, or that you even have to like all of your love’s history… But no-one’s life is a clean slate, and nobody is perfect.
When you marry someone, you accept their faults and foibles.
When you marry someone, you accept their history.
Granted, you may not know EVERYTHING about your partner when you get married, but as you live and love and grow together, you make a plan to live and love and grow with and around the experiences you share and the ones you go through seperately.

Your other half’s history is a big part of what made him (or her) the person you love with all your heart, is it not!?

I am truly blessed in that my marriage is like that. We both have habits that drive each other bananas.
But the nature of a loving marriage is that either you learn to live with those annoyances, or you try to change what annoys your partner, otherwise it will become the straw that breaks the camel’s back.
The two of us also have our own seperate histories. There are parts of our histories that we both wish were different, but we will not allow those things to ruin our relationship because they are a part of us.
If my husband had children from a previous relationship I would do everything in my power to make sure those children felt at home when they were with me – the way my husband has done for my son, and the way all three of my siblings AND three of my cousins have done for the people they love who brought children with them into their relationships.

Sadly not everyone has a marriage and a relationship like mine and my Glugster’s.

About Angel

Wife, mom, cake artist, Guide Dog puppy raiser, ADHD champion, wedding planner, and tattooed cat slave.
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2 Responses to Thats How I thought It Worked…

  1. Bex says:

    He has 6. kids. I have 2. He has four sets of parents. They each of multiple shared sets of kids. (He has a total of 14 mismatched siblings). I have two sets of parents, but extra sibilings. I get it. We knew very little of each others pasts. I tend to overshare. He tends to “doesn’t share”… At 6+ years and counting we learn new stuff every day. But we also get stronger in our relationship every day. It’s difficult though. It is.
    Bex recently posted…Hey, It’s OK Tuesday!!My Profile

  2. Katy says:

    🙁 that is how I think it should work too