To My Darling Damien
Today is April 5th, 2006.
Today it is your 15th birthday. And for some strange reason, this birthday of yours seems like a lot more of a “milestone” to me than any of your others did. Your granny says it’s because you’re in high school now. Maybe- but I think there’s more to it than that. I have to pinch myself to make sure I’m not dreaming and you are really going to be 15 years old today! You are a young man now, and I am so immensely proud of who you are and how you have grown up that I don’t have words for it.
Lately though, its been on my mind a lot that I have fairly little time left where I will still have you all to myself… in the blink of an eye you’ll be moving out and buying a car and dating and working and doing all kinds of grown up things… and I wish I could postpone it all for a few more years!
It really does feel like it was just yesterday that you smiled your beautiful smile at me for the first time; that you laughed out loud for the first time; that you spoke your first words; that you sat on your own for the first time and when you took your first steps.
I’ll never forget how, when you were about seven months old, I went job hunting and I had a tiny little picture of you in my wallet. I took the picture out while I was having my lunch and wondering what you were doing at home with good old Lisbet. All of a sudden you looked so different to me. It was as if I saw the shape of your eyes and your beautiful mouth for the first time! The memory of that moment is so clear in my mind it’s like it was yesterday!
The day I first took you to nursery school I couldn’t believe how time had flown by- and then it almost felt like the very next day I was dropping you off for your first day in grade one. Not to mention your first day in high school! Now THAT was a shocker and a half!
I am so very proud of all you have achieved in your life so far. Getting provincial colours in gymnastics and all your medals. And then there’s your progress at school and how much your teachers always like you. And your relationships with your friends and family always make my heart glad. And the Damien shaped impression on this world of ours always makes me want to brag to anyone and everyone who may listen! I love you!
I love you, I love you, I love you! I cannot ever say it enough and I love how you say it back to me!
I love how you still kiss me goodnight every night.
I love how you still want to snuggle in bed with me like you did when you were little.
I love how you don’t hesitate to kiss me goodbye when I drop you off at school in the morning.
I love how you go out of your way to get me something that you know I want for my birthday and for Christmas.
I love how you are always so quick to think of others.
I love how you still like to go out with me, to movies and such, when so many other teenagers would long ago have been too embarrassed to be seen with their parents.
I love your drawings.
I love how you can keep yourself busy for hours on end.
I love how you love nice clothes.
I love how you love your Granny & Grampa, and how you like spending time with them and hate to disappoint them.
I love how you love your uncle Gareth.
I love how smart you are when it comes to animals.
I love how loyal you are to your friends and family.
I love your incredible general knowledge.
I love how much your teachers always like you.
I love how you love your family so much.
I love how you love science fiction movies.
I love how you always giggle at
I love how you laugh out loud at Asterix & Obelix.
I love how you love seafood and how you’re always game to experiment with different foods.
I love how you love spare-ribs.
There is so much I want to say to you in your life and I often feel like I don’t get to it or I forget what I wanted to say or I think I’ve said it wrong and you didn’t quite understand what I was trying to tell you… I wish I could somehow make sure that you would be happy forever. That one day you will meet the girl of your dreams and you get married and have children and live happily ever after.
I want you to have a career of your own choosing- something that makes you happy and fulfilled.
I want you to be financially secure and never want for anything. And if there was some way that I could actually ensure that this would happen for you- I wouldn’t hesitate to pull out all the stops to do just that!
And just for interest sake, here are some things that happened on this day in history-
1614 – In
1804 – The first recorded meteorite falls in
1969 – Vietnam War: Massive antiwar demonstrations are held in
1975 – Chiang Kai-shek, Chinese nationalist leader (b. 1887) died.
1976 – In the People’s Republic of China, the April Fifth Movement leads to the Tiananmen incident & Howard Hughes, American aviation pioneer, film director, and eccentric (b. 1905) died.
1991 – ASA Embraer EMB 120 crashes in
1994 – Kurt Cobain, American musician (b. 1967) died.
Here are some people who share your birthday-
1288 – Emperor Go-Fushimi of
1588 – Thomas Hobbes, English philosopher (d. 1679)
1649 – Elihu Yale, American benefactor of
1856 – Booker T. Washington, American educator (d. 1915)
1900 – Spencer Tracy, American actor (d. 1967)
1908 – Bette Davis, American actress (d. 1989)
1916 – Gregory Peck, American actor (d. 2003)
You, my darling Damien, are my life. You are the very centre of my very small universe. As unhealthy as some people may try to tell me that is- I have had an expert (in other words, a psychiatrist) tell me that I have NOT screwed you up completely, that you are intellectually mature and a very pleasant conversationalist and fabulous company all round. And he’s not the only one I’ve heard this from either.
Be proud of yourself always. Like yourself always.
I want you to know that for as long as I possibly can I will do all I can for you.
All my love