I Had A Wee Little Epiphany This Weekend…

Is there even such a thing as a minor epiphany? I mean, I fully grasp the concept of epiphanies- but this one wasn’t exactly mind boggling or life altering or anything…
Anyhoo. Moving on.
I was at a birthday party for the daughter of some very dear friends of mine (aka Damien’s weekend family). Their little girl is three now, so there were a LOT of three and four year old girls at this party, as well as a few babies. Apart from one little boy of about ten years old, Damien was by far the eldest. A few older kids arrived later in the afternoon, but Damien was older than them too. The other moms were all about my age- some younger- but I really had nothing in common with them. Any blogger out there who has had children will know how it goes when moms with kids of comparable ages get together- the whole conversation revolves around babies and children. What and how they eat, how many teeth they have, which milestone they’ve reached, how they’re progressing at school, which class they’re in and how the moms and kidlets feel about their kid’s teachers.
And then there’s mois- with a child more than five times older than everyone else’s- I can and do try to join in on the conversation, but for me it’s all past tense; and things are very different now to when Damien was a toddler! And don’t get me wrong- these moms weren’t rude or distant or anything, but those conversations just aren’t interesting for me anymore! I spent most of my time taking pictures of the party and that was great fun (the nice thing with a digital is you can be looking at a baby to get them to smile without disappearing behind the camera and losing the smile!)
Before I get completely off topic here- my epiphany was this: I don’t really seem to “fit in” with my friends and most of the people in my social circle anymore.
Does that make sense?
It was a rather strange, um, set of thoughts. I don’t want to do baby-talk because I’m way past that and things have changed so much. But no one in my social circle has teenager stories to swap with me… the rest of the group of people I hang out with (friends of friends that I see at my friends homes a lot of the time) are couples, and I’m not part of a couple.

Sorry- it’s a little disjointed… its hard to write this down without making it seem like I feel like I’m losing out… when I’m not… KWIM?

9 thoughts on “I Had A Wee Little Epiphany This Weekend…

  1. I don’t mind reliving the baby years as they were some of my fondest as a parent, but I can relate to your situation all too well as we seem to be out of synch with the rest of our neighborhood. All the children are either five years older or younger than Procrastinator Junior, who is ten.

    All of his socializing for the most part, is done outside of the neighborhood.

  2. I agree with katt – those of us who don’t have babies and toddlers – but teenagers, should talk about our pets when other mommy’s begin to discuss the babies!

    Hows that sound Sis – next time we’ll talk about Pearl and Greebo and Taxi. LOL!!!

  3. allan: sometimes VERY “way past it”!!!

    cooks: howzit dude- nice to see you again!

    my mommy: i too would not change my experience for the world… but i must be honest- it is indeed a strange thing to begin seriously contemplating what you’ll do when your kids move out when you’re only 33! these days most woman are only having their first child at my age!

    spooks: sis- you know i could NEVER feel like i don’t fit with you!

    gareth: oh i know that doll! i doubt i’d get any invitations if my friends thought that way, LOL!

    katt: oh darling i can SO relate- my cats are EXACTLY the same!

  4. I can so relate to this. I’m 34 and I have never had kids. And yes, when you find yourself in a conversation with new mommies, the talk does always turn to babies. I’ve learnt to just shut up because my comments of “Oh, I know what you mean because Houndus Maximus went through the phase of putting everything in his mouth too so he could taste it” were met with disgusted stares and comments of “A dog is not a baby!”

    Wanna bet? He is going through his teenage years and yes, he is broody, sulky, stubborn and often gives me the “What do you know?” look.

    So, maybe we can swap stories. 😀

  5. The only reason that you don’t fit in is because it’s all in your mind, it’s how you feel. I can guarantee that all your friends don’t see this 😉

  6. Ja I can relate – have been in that situation for 33 years and the only people I could have something in common with (kid-wise) were older and oh! so dull. Result: younger friends with kids the age of mine. Think about it – how many friends of ours have kids your ages? More Candy & Gareth’s ages yes.
    One never seems to fit in ……. Even as a couple – how many grandparents in their late 30’s do you get? And people with grandchildren Damien’s age talk right past me – what do I know about teenage grandchildren, really.
    I can SO relate to your situation! But we can offer hard-earned advice and tips!!
    We quite different and that’s cool – I have always loved being a young parent and I would not change it for the world!
    Love you!

  7. Yeah, I KWYM. I feel outta place a lot (for diff reasons), but it’s not a ‘losing out’ thing…as you said, it’s a “way past it” feeling

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