… that when I read other mommy blogs about how proud they are of their children and how full of mommy love they are and how much they love their kidlets… that I can’t seem to summon up any of those feelings for my knucklehead?
Make no mistake- I will never ever stop loving him, he is my Damien.
But I don’t like him very much right now.
I want my little Strawbreez back.
I want my little snugglepumpkin back… the little monster who would squish his feet in behind my bum on the couch- back when he still fitted on one cushion- so we could watch TV together.
I want my munchkin who used to want to sit on my lap and wrap his arms around my neck and snuggle up to me for absolutely no reason other than I happened to be sitting down.
As smart as he is, and as brilliant as I know he can be, I am THIS close to telling him to get the hell out and make something of himself!
He spends all day every day at home. Playing PS2, watching TV, smoking the odd joint, and eating me out of house and home. He’s still taking his meds as far as I can tell- apart from last week- but the grass counteracts it, and he knows that! And he knows I don’t want him smoking it because its illegal as well as bad for him.
I just don’t know what to do anymore to try and motivate him to do something for himself!
He’s making no attempt to find work, and as much as I am enjoying having no school related stress anymore- he is slowly but surely using up all his credit in my good books.
Any other moms to adults out there ever felt this way?