I Am…

I just am. I’m here. 🙂

I have no less than 7 cupcake orders for The Cupcake Lady for this weekend, one of which is for a wedding I’m going to be delivering to on Saturday morning. I love that I have that many orders, but it means there’s not much time for other things. I have finally completed my wedding planning course and handed in my assignment- my presentation was done last night- which frees up my Monday nights again and what I am looking forward to most is lying in bed watching hours and hours of PVR with my darling Glugster!

I’ve missed out so much on all the blogs I usually read… I haven’t been able to do any reading in days!! I miss you guys something awful!

We applied to adopt a couple of dogs from Wetnose and the adoption has been approved. My Glugs and the knucklehead will be fetching them on Saturday June 5th. We coulda done it sooner, but I’d rather be home most of the weekend when they do arrive. Now we go to get a big kennel for them, and collars and leashes and bowls and such.

My daddy darling is really battling with his diabetes, kidneys and blood pressure. His diabetes is mostly under control, but his kidneys are shot and currently functioning at 19%. This forks with his blood pressure something chronic and he can’t keep food down. He can’t sleep which means he can’t recover even a little bit.  He’s now having Eprex shots to aid his drastic anemia, which they say will help with his dreadful nausea and sleeping issues as well as his generally feeling down and having no energy. I do hope it helps. We’re all dreadfully worried about him and my mommy darling is taking serious strain.

The situation with the knucklehead’s father weighs heavily on my heart. A big part of me genuinely wishes he’d ignored my letter, or told me he doesn’t want to meet the knucklehead. When I told Damien he’d called me back and we’d made plans to meet- which is now happening on Monday night May 31st– Damien wasn’t hugely excited or anything, he just said “Cool.” which is his standard response. Then yesterday I left my phone at home by accident, and Damien was answering it for me. His father phoned, and Damien says the man was so excited to talk him! The knucklehead was so chuffed he even emailed me to tell me his father is psyched to meet him. Firstly when the knucklehead mailed me I thought he’d been phoned on his phone so I was anxiously curious about how his father had gotten his number, but when I was driving home I was thinking about it and I registered he’d probably called on my number. Apparently he called to say he could help the knucklehead find a job, and that also got me curious because I hadn’t said anything to him about that aspect… which again makes me wonder if he’s reading me here… but that just has me curious. What’s getting to me is how stoked Damien is to meet him. Its making me heartsore that he is so eager and excited to meet his biological father. I am very glad he is, I think I would much rather have him happy about it that being miserable and pissed off with the man… but at the same time I really wish he wasn’t looking forward to it quite so much. Does that make sense…? I do wish he’d waited till after the wedding to ask me to find the man though… I coulda done without the additional stress at this point 😐

The wedding plans are going fabulously well. I would like to get as much as possible sorted and finalised and paid before the world cup starts because so many of my service providers are bus during the world cup. Our wedding dance is going to be great fun. We’re working on that every week now too. And there’s still time to make a donation to my nephew Nathan’s account for the “seat raffle” if you’d like to… 😛

My job is busy as all hell. We’re all paddling furiously to keep our heads above water, and all I want to do is stay home and bake 🙁

Hopefully things will get back to my version of normal soon…

22 thoughts on “I Am…

  1. If I had to guess why he’s so excited then I’d say it’s probably the mystery of the never-seen-father that’s got him so worked up. It’s cool in a way…not so cool for you Angel, but you must know that Damian loves you to bits. Let him get to know (or at least meet) his dad and he’ll soon form his own opinion once the mystery is revealed and the excitement dies down. I’m guessing that the dad also did a lot of growing up since you last saw him? If he has been reading your blog, maybe he’s been dying to meet Damian too and perhaps keeping his distance our of respect/regret ? It would be pretty cool if he could get the knucklehead (or help get) a job.

    I’m sorry you’re having a rough time with this hun. *huggs* I’m sure I’ll go through it with Nicola too at some stage. It’s not something I look forward to at all.
    .-= Louisa´s last blog ..The hairy truth about the blue ears… =-.

  2. Sorry I have not been keeping up with blog reading so have been very much of of the loop.

    Very exciting about all the wedding plans, and the cup cake business taking off. And the new doggies!

    Sorry to hear your dad is not well.

    Hope D meet up with his dad goes ok, and I think your fears and feelings are perfectly natural. But no matter how excited he is or how well they get on, D won;t forget who raised him and all you have done for him and been to him. EVER. I am sure of it.

    .-= JaneF´s last blog ..I have a dream… =-.

  3. Wow…

    Im so glad the cupcake orders are coming in nicely!

    Your dad and family are in my prayers!!!

    I think the only thing you can do for Damien is be there for him, let him know that no matter what happens with his father, good OR bad, you will be there for him…

    .-= Gina´s last blog ..How to fall pregnant in 12 easy steps… =-.

  4. Wow, so much swirling in you head right now, lady! Am keeping my finger’s crossed for you about your Dad, that must be so awful 🙁 And I’m sure once you’ve had the meeting with Damien’s dad things will normalise there a bit. It’s just the awful anticipation and not knowing what to expect, it’d drive me nuts too!

    Am thinking of you lots & lots 🙂 ps. YAYAYAY about finishing your wedding course!
    .-= phillygirl´s last blog ..Not The Way to Start The Day =-.

  5. Love Sharon’s comment. It’s so so true.
    So sorry about your Daddy Darling and will be thinking of you and Damien..x

  6. You are a very savvy and capable lady and I have no doubt that you will handle any situation that may arise after D meets his biological father with your usual grace & wisdom
    .-= Sharon´s last blog ..Aircraft Overhead =-.

  7. Yay for cupcakes! And I’m sorry to hear about the kidney business 🙁 You are such a brave and strong woman … your Damien may enjoy meeting his father but his heart is firmly wrapped around you … ::hugs::
    .-= Darla´s last blog ..shouldn’t blog drunk =-.

  8. YAY for the cupcake orders 🙂 And well done on your course!

    Sorry about your dad 🙁 Its scary and heartbreaking watching those we love in pain ((HUGS and LOVE)) to you both!!

    Cant wait to see the dance 🙂 We are super excited!
    .-= Laura´s last blog ..Why I love my job =-.

  9. Yay, for 7 orders…I hope this means that soon you’ll get to stay home and just bake. I’m putting out all the good thoughts into the universe that things work out the best for D and your dad.
    .-= cassey´s last blog ..I’ve been thinking =-.

  10. Ah Angel, so much going on. Bridget’s story is very real and it may happen that way but you are going to have to let him travel the road and walk this journey while you stand aside supporting him.

    I feel so for you about your dad, its is very very difficult – nothing prepares a child (us) for the heartache of watching our parents suffer ailing health.

    .-= Mel´s last blog ..Photo Tag =-.

  11. Gosh, things are hectic on your side. I really hope your father’s health improve – I just had that moment last night where I realized that my aunt (and mom therefore) are really getting old now.

    I really do not know what to say about the dad situation – I guess there is nothing much that you can do right now than to hope for the best, and then which option is the best??? Know one thin g- you have been his mom for all his life, he will not love you less. Of that one I am sure.

  12. Sjoe! so many things to have to cope with over and above the wedding! *hugs* Am really thinking and praying for you guys, for your dad and for the whole situation with Damien meeting his father. *hugs*
    .-= Ruby´s last blog ..Dear Baby Cuz =-.

  13. Thank you Blackhuff

    Bridget, this is exactly what all I am afraid of. And if I try and prepare Damien for all that I sound like a completely negative killjoy… 🙁
    .-= Angel´s last blog ..I Am… =-.

  14. Even though I haven’t been through it myself, I totally get how you feel about the thing with Damien & his father. It does make sense and you’re not being unreasonable.

    Sounds to me like the cupcake thing is taking off nicely! I’m so glad. 🙂

    Also, can’t wait to see the end result of all that wedding planning!

  15. Your plate sounds full hun. 🙂 Well done on making cupcake business a success, soon you’ll join me and stay home baking all day!! 🙂

    I met my biological father when I was 18. When I knew who he was I couldn’t get enough of him. I was so happy to get to know him and he was excited to meet me too. It was an amazing time in my life, which was why it hit me so hard when I realized he actually had another life. While I’d spent my childhood pining for him, missing him in my life, imagining he thought of me as often and loved me as much as I loved him, he was having other kids, getting married, divorced, advancing his career and after a whirlwind couple months of a glorious reunion I was suddenly bereft. And had to adjust to new siblings, him NOT having time for me as my mum and dad (step) had, had for me. The biggest blow came when he started not keeping his promises. Like promising me a job and not delivering. And of course our relationship has reached a comfortable medium now but I know my mum would be in my corner when things are tough while he’d probably be busy with his other life. Whatever happens between D and his father, it is inevitable. All you as his mum can do is be there when he needs you and he will always need you. Good luck. 🙂

  16. I really feel so sorry for you how you feel about the thing with your son and his father. It can’t be nice at all and I hope and pray that it works out fine. Hugs.
    Your father is in my prayers.
    7 Cupcake orders, sjoe but you are busy. Enjoy 🙂
    .-= blackhuff´s last blog ..Teaching children life lessons =-.

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