Being Afraid of Covid

Since Covid-19 started spreading around the world, I’ve been nervous.
When it got to SA, I was more than nervous, and the faster it spread the more nervous I got.
For about two weeks before our president announced an official lockdown for South Africa I have been careful, and my hubby and son have been home with me since March 16th. I’ve only been popping to the shops when absolutely necessary – my Glugster usually going for me. My business has completely shut down, as have many others – no social gatherings means nobody needs cupcakes.
I’m not paranoid – I’m asthmatic. I am one of the people they’re talking about when they say “at risk”. I have been asthmatic all my life. Yes – I aggravated it with smoking, and I have pets – but I am also allergic to more than 70 plants and grasses, so I’m always on meds, and for the most part its under control.
If I do get flu, I rush to get it under control before it turns into Bronchitis because once I’m coughing, I’m screwed.
I’ve been hospitalised for my asthma five or six times as an adult, at least three of those times because flu turned into Pneumonia. And I’ve been lucky, I’ve always had medical aid and someone to look after my kid and my family and my animals while I’m hospitalised for a week at a time. :/

Now do this – take a deep breath, as deep as you can. Exhale as much as you can, and inhale again. Do it again. Do you ever think about being able to do that? Actually test yourself to check how your lungs are doing?
Unless you have experienced it, I cannot describe to you how scary it is to not be able to breathe. To not be able to yawn. To not be able to speak more than three words at a time. To be left breathless by pulling a T-shirt over your head.
And this is BEFORE I end up on a drip and oxygen and physiotherapy!
Its terrifying!

Even before the Corona virus started its mission, I was careful. I loathed touching an ATM, an elevator button, escalator banisters… I would wear a bandanna over my face if I had to sit in a doctor’s waiting room. People’s sidelong glances are hysterical, but I don’t want to catch whatever the people in the waiting room might have!
Corona has made me even more careful.
In the last week, a small part of me has even wanted my husband and son to stay two metres away from me if they’ve been in contact with other people, but I have to shake myself sane because I am already THIS close to being a complete germophobe!

Every morning I wake up wondering if I am going to start feeling COVID-19 symptoms today. Wondering if anyone I’ve been exposed to in the last week has passed it to me.
Every time my Glugster or my knucklehead goes to the shop I add 10 days to my count, hoping they weren’t exposed to the virus while they were out.
If my chest gets a little tight in the day, or I sneeze or cough, I hope like hell that my nearest hospital will have a bed and oxygen for me if I get sick…

This is not about you. This is not about a lockdown impacting your holiday plans, or you being stuck at home with your kids.
This is about NOT spreading a clearly dangerous virus, which you ARE able to transmit even before you feel sick, BEFORE you even know you have the virus.


#Coronavirus #COVID19 #StayHome